Archive for December, 2007

December 28

This is the date that I needed be tattooed into my partially absent-minded shell. I have just committed an unforgivable sin, mostly unforgivable on myself. You see, this particular date is very important to me. This was the date when my wife accepted me for the 3rd time to be a part of her life. This was the date that started all the greatest things that would happen in my “was” miserable life. This was the date that I just forgot celebrating for our 5th year together.

My mind was so preoccupied with what needed to be prepared, accomplished, or planned for the holiday season. Most of it was due to financial constraints that I had set aside in which I went over. I had no plans whatsoever for this sandwiched day within the holidays. I even forgot on filling it as a vacation leave, the reason I am here at the office on this very special day. I should have planned this day the entire year more than I should have done for any given occasion. In short, I screwed up.

I work nightshifts. Before we parted this evening, she gave me a small envelope. I didn’t bother opening it until I was at the office since I thought it was just a thoughtful way of greeting me for the holidays. When I finally did, the card inside the envelope read, “Happy Anniversary Honey!!!” These were the first words I noticed written in noticeable size than the rest of the text. As I stared at the letters, I realized the gravity of the pain I have caused her in a snail’s pace. As I read through the letter, I slowly sank into where I was seated. The more I read, the more I felt smaller like I was being eaten from the core of my being and then my eyes paved way for tears. The letter read:

          “It’s our 5th year anniversary and I want to congratulate you for everything that you’ve done for us, for being such a great Dad to Aleci and Abrelle, to celebrate our 5 years that we’ve fought and lived together and for the years that is yet to come.
         
I love you so much honey! These words I tell you can’t have more meaning than anything else than they ever possibly could. I can’t imagine life without you. You are my everything. I am so blessed with your love and devotion. I love you with all my faults and my achievements. I love you with all that I am. I love you for who you are.
        
I am sorry for the crazy things I say and for the way I just am. We can get through the roughest times and still know in our hearts that we can’t live without each other is what makes it even more special.

The truth is I am a very hard partner and she endured me for what I am, more like accepted and loved the worst and best of me. There will be times that a better person will challenge her place in my heart one after the other. They may be far better than her but no one amongst them is really better because no better can ever challenge the best. Our partner is termed as our better half but for me, she’s my best half of whom without I shall never desire of continuing this journey called life.


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